Inspire

For the movers and shakers

Ripping up paper the right way…

Hi, there lovely readers. Introspection. I suspect we’ve all been indulging in this of late – examining our thoughts and feelings as we reconcile with COVID-19. For me, exploring my own company one week, my loved one’s the next as I flit between two homes; work kit in one box, temperament in another. No children involved. I can’t begin to imagine what life’s been like for those who’ve been juggling partners and kids 24/7. Make or break, survive, thrive or implode. How many words expressed that were better left unsaid?

For the most part, expressing ourselves is vital, for effective communication with family, friends, and work colleagues is critical for healthy, harmonious relationships. There are also times where suppressing them is even more critical. We pat our selves on the back for being so disciplined as we keep those thought bubbles intact yet all that pent up emotion can have disastrous emotional consequences. So how can we let those thought bubbles burst without potential blowback? Journalling my lovely friends. Journalling.

"There are no accusations with writing, no judgment, no shame, only freedom "
(Jessica Sorensen)

Psychologists, sport and otherwise, recommend writing for it’s an effective way to check in with our thoughts, feelings and emotions, positive, negative, or otherwise. An opportunity to process the noise in our heads and allow the subconscious to have a voice. Just enjoying the physical act of putting pen to paper can be a panacea for the soul. No surprises then, that paper journals have been enjoying a resurgence of late. They’re considered the new ‘mindfulness’ app, as evidenced by the volume of beautiful paper journals currently on the market. That said, for those planning to explore the beauty of journaling, opening to that first crisp white page can be quite daunting. What to write?

How to acknowledge thoughts through words and drawings

Keen to totally immerse yourself in the moment as you take your favourite pen to your brand new paper? Why not start by engaging all the senses? It’s simple. First up, create five columns. Now head them up with ‘Smell’, ‘Touch’, Taste’, ‘See’, and ‘Hear’ (or descriptors that personally resonate for you). Now jot down all the fragrances that appeal to you in the ‘Smell’ column. Roast lamb, roses, the ocean, mown grass, wet cats, forest floors – whatever your bliss, jot them all down. Repeat for the remainder. Oh! And be sure to surround yourself with at least one from each list daily – a great way to reconnect with the simple joys of life.

Dealing with a difficult person or situation? Or someone who elicits strong positive or negative emotions but to whom you might find it difficult, if not impossible, to talk to in real life? Let those thoughts and feelings bleed onto your paper. Don’t judge, criticise, or censor your thoughts or pay any attention to spelling, grammar, or tidiness, just let the words flow. Don’t lift the pen, simply keep those emotions flowing. Ahhh… now doesn’t that feel good?

Trying to reconcile with past experiences? Journalling by way of a letter to a person with whom you may have had, or still have, a challenging relationship issue, can also be helpful. It won’t be posted, but it may help you make peace with yourself.

Hampered by creative block? Doodling, sketching to visualise ideas, jotting down keywords, end goals, plotting thoughts all have the potential to unblock. Take a peek at Visual Journalling on Pinterest for inspiration.

Struggling to find grounding? When life seems to have thrown a particularly wicked curveball your way, a gratitude journal is a great way to remind yourself of the positives in your life. It may be as simple as ‘I made someone smile today’, ‘I’m healthy’. ‘I have a roof over my head’. ‘Had a lovely walk this eve’, ‘Enjoyed time with my friend’, had the best almond milk chai latte. A great way to lift your spirit when feeling low.

A bundle of worries cluttering the mind? Write them all down, review, and identify those you don’t have any control over. No draw a firm line through them and contract with yourself to never revisit them. Now jot two things you’ll do to address those you can control on a new page. Voila, your subconscious has something positive to work on while your sleeping. Speaking of sleep…

Counting sheep to find sleep? Experts say we should grab that journal and write the minute we wake, 200 words plus as we release a stream of consciousness in preparation for the coming day. Doing the same last thing in the eve is known to help clear the mind from what I call the ‘chattering monkeys’, instilling a sense of calm as we cruise into sleep. Good night 🙂

Dealing with Zoomin’ fatigue…

Hi, there lovely readers – I’ve been thinking about our new way of communicating. How many of you have conducted happy hour drinkies with friends, checked in on family, collaborated with work colleagues, the children’s school teachers, and perhaps even your doctor via video call? Most of you I’m sure, for it’s the new norm. And I’m beginning to find it exhausting, aren’t you? It seems I’m not alone for the feeling has spurred talk of a new psychological affliction: “Zoom fatigue.”Mentions of “Zoom fatigue” have increasingly popped up on social media, and Google searches for the same phrase have steadily increased since we moved to self-isolation. So why are we finding video calls so draining? 

Video conferencing forces us to focus more intently on conversations to absorb information, whereas when in a conference room, a whispered side exchange can help us quickly catch up if we’ve been distracted. Unless we use the private chat feature or fiddle with the unmute button to ask a colleague to repeat themselves, the information goes begging.

Video calls also make it easier than ever to lose focus. We figure that yes, we absolutely can listen while checking our email, texting a friend, popping an emoji on WhatsApp, and all within the same thirty seconds. Except, of course, such distractions mean we don’t end up doing much listening at all. Oh! And add to this our work-from-home situations. 

We’re no longer just dialing into one or two virtual meetings, and if we don’t have a private space to do so, we’re continually asking our loved ones not to disturb us. Or we are trying not to laugh as they slither across the floor to grab something from the dining table.  

How we process information via video calls also contributes to “Zoom fatigue”, given the only way we can show we’re paying attention is to look at the camera. In real life, how often do we stand within three feet of a colleague and stare at their face? Rarely. Engaging in a “constant gaze” makes us both uncomfortable and tired

In-person, we use our peripheral vision to glance out the window or look at others in the room, on a video call we worry that by doing so, folk will think we’re not paying attention. On a video call, we are also staring at a small image of ourselves, hyper-aware of every wrinkle, every expression, and we’re worried about how folk might interpret us. No wonder our brains are growing fatigued. 

It’s not all bad news! Here are five research-based tips that can help us all make video calls less exhausting.

Stop Multitasking 

We think we can combat more tasks in less time; however, research shows that trying to do multiple things at once actually compromises performance. As we need to turn certain parts of our brain off and on for different types of work, switching between tasks can cost as much as 40 % of our productive time. Researchers also say that when we multitask, we can’t remember things as well as our more singularly focused peers. 

When next you’re on video chat, close any tabs or programs that might distract you, put your phone away, and stay present. That text, email, or Snapchat response can wait 15 minutes, and you’ll be able to craft a better response when you’ve finished.

Build in a break or two 

Schedule mini-breaks during longer calls by minimising the window or by taking your gaze away from your computer for a few seconds. It’s possible to listen without staring at the screen for the whole duration. Simply let your eyes rest for a moment. For those days when you’ve back-to-back calls, try making them 25 or 50 minutes; giving yourself enough time in between to get up, stretch and move around before the next. If you are on a video call of an hour or more, let folks know it’s okay to turn their cameras off for parts of the call.

Reduce onscreen stimuli 

Research shows that when we’re on video, we tend to spend the most time gazing at our own face. To avoid this, hide yourself from view. I’m sure you won’t be surprised to learn that on video, we focus on other people’s backgrounds as well. Viewing the furniture, plants, and wallpaper in five or more other people’s rooms means our brains have to process multiple visual environmental cues at the same time. Encouraging people to use plain backgrounds, or agree as a group to have everyone who is not talking turn off their video will help combat mental fatigue.

Make virtual social events optional 

After days of back-to-back video calls, it’s normal to feel drained, particularly if you’re an introvert. Keeping virtual social sessions optional, meaning that people are welcome but not obligated to join will help. Why not appoint a facilitator if you’re expecting a large group. And to ensure everyone doesn’t start speaking at once, make it clear in what order people should talk so that all have the opportunity to hear one another. Create and circulate a brief framework of goals as well for it’s easy to get overwhelmed when we are unsure of what the video call expects of us, or if we’re continually trying to figure out when we should or should not chime in.

Switch to phone calls or email 

Are there any conversations you could have over Slack or email instead? If it’s late, you’re feeling video fatigued, and you’ve yet another call, why not ask the person with whom you plan to speak “I’d love a break from video calls, how would you feel if we were to do this over the phone?” I bet your one on one will appreciate. 

Many people now feel a tendency to treat video as the default for all communication. Yet, video calls can feel relatively intimate and invasive in some situations, especially when communicating with people such as clients or network outside of your organisation. Folk with whom you’d usually talk to via phone. If your client FaceTimes you with no warning, it’s okay to decline and suggest a call instead.

Having stared at my own and 25 other faces across 30 hours from midnight to dawn for five days straight, I fell into a classic state of Zoom fatigue and will thus be implementing every one of these steps! Of course, feel free to add your own suggestions in the comments box. 

Stay safe, dear reader x

The art of escapism during iso…

Hi there lovely peoples, still having fun in self-isolation land? Finally able to sneak a little time for yourself, to relax, regroup and re-energise? Promised I’d round up and share a few books and Netflix/Foxtel marathons into your regroup box and. Thanks to friends and colleagues skilled in the art of escapism, here’s their top 5:  

Book fix

Looking to fuel your apocalyptic fascination? After reading these dystopian novels, you’ll feel surprisingly reassured about life post-pandemic.

Station Eleven (Emily St John Mandel) – centres around Jeevan, one of the few survivors after mysterious flu quickly turns into a full-blown pandemic. This book is beautifully written.

The Hunger Games trilogy (Suzanne Collins) focuses on a futuristic view of survival of the fittest. If you didn’t see the movies, grab these and cheer for Katniss.

Brave New World (Aldus Huxley) – published in 1932 – shares a future where citizens are environmentally engineered into an intelligence-based social hierarchy. Read it in the 70’s – scared the wits out of me!

1984 (George Orwell) published in 1949 – depicts an imagined future, the year 1984, when the world has fallen victim to perpetual war, omnipresent government surveillance, historical negationism and propaganda. The darkest of classics.

The Handmaids Tale (Margaret Atwood) – features a dystopian world that unfolds after a second American civil war, where a totalitarian society subjects fertile women, called ‘Handmaids’ into child-bearing slavery. I’ve been obsessed with the SBS series!

Series fix

Who doesn’t love a good marathon? This is an eclectic bunch with something for everyone, except the kiddies.

Ozarkcentres on a married couple forced to relocate their family to the Ozarks following amoney-laundering scheme gone wrong. Darlene remains in my nightmares!

Mad Men – a classic about a womanising advertising executive, the plot tracks the people in his personal and professional lives, and as the series progresses, you’ll observe the changing moods and social mores of the US throughout the 1960s. Damn, I love you Don, you sexy beast!

Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem and Madness – this “crazy true crime” documentary centres on Joe Exotic, grandiose big cat zoo owner (and country musician), convicted for trying to put a hit on animal rights activist Carole Baskin. Jaysus there’s a few cray-cray’s out there!

The English Game – set in the 1870s, football was once a sport for the wealthy British before a working-class star and his upper-class counterpart come together to change the Game forever. For a non-sporty girl, I loved this series.

Succession – centres on the fictional Roy family, the dysfunctional owners of a global media and hospitality empire who are fighting for control of the company amidst uncertainty about the health of the family’s patriarch. Gripping season finale – can’t wait for the next season! 

I know you’ll have heaps more – why not drop them into the comments box below. Meanwhile, enjoy!

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